absurdtools

Travel Phrasebook

Essential travel phrases in twelve languages with pronunciation and speech, working offline once loaded.

36 curated phrases per language, stored on the page — this works offline once loaded. For anything not covered here, the Language Translator handles free-form text in 40 languages.

The same 36 phrases run from 186 characters to 760

Every language here says the same 36 things. Counting the characters it takes to say them, against 629 for the English:

LanguageCharactersAgainst the EnglishScript
Mandarin Chinese 186 0.30× other
Korean 290 0.46× other
Japanese 322 0.51× other
Arabic 453 0.72× other
Gujarati 512 0.81× other
Hindi 544 0.86× other
Russian 562 0.89× other
Italian 616 0.98× Latin
Portuguese (Brazil) 625 0.99× Latin
Spanish 649 1.03× Latin
German 705 1.12× Latin
French 760 1.21× Latin

A spread of 4.1 from end to end, and it is not about verbosity. A Chinese character is a whole word or a large part of one; a Latin letter is a sound. Counting characters across writing systems compares two different units and calls them the same.

Which matters the moment anything is measured in characters — a database column, a message limit, a field with a counter on it. A limit that fits a French sentence comfortably fits four Mandarin ones, and a limit set by looking at English will cut French off first.

The Latin split is exactly five and seven, with nothing in between

There is a "Latin letters only" switch above, and the interesting thing about it is how cleanly the languages divide. Five are written entirely in Latin letters and seven entirely outside them. Not one is mixed.

LanguagesRows the switch changes
Latin letters Italian, Portuguese, Spanish, German, French none of 180
Another script Mandarin Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Arabic, Gujarati, Hindi, Russian all 252

Turning it on would be a poor trade if it hid phrases, and it does not: every one of the 432 cells in this book has both a translation and a pronunciation, with no gaps anywhere. So the switch swaps 252 unreadable rows for 252 readable ones rather than removing them. That is a completeness claim worth checking rather than asserting, so the test counts every cell.

One coincidence worth naming: on this sample every non-Latin language is shorter than every Latin one. That is a pattern rather than a rule — Russian, at 562 characters, comes within 54 of closing the gap, and a slightly different phrase list would close it.

How to use

  1. Pick your language and the situation you expect to be in.
  2. Read the phrase alongside its pronunciation guide.
  3. Tap to hear it spoken, and repeat it aloud a few times.
  4. Learn a handful properly rather than skimming all of them.
  5. Load the page before you travel — it works offline afterwards.

Frequently asked questions

Which phrases are actually worth learning?

Please, thank you, hello, sorry, do you speak English, and how much. That handful carries most of the practical value and — more importantly — signals that you made an effort, which changes how people respond to you far more than fluency in a few extra sentences ever would.

Does it matter if my pronunciation is poor?

Considerably less than people fear. The attempt is what registers, and native speakers routinely meet a bad accent with patience and help rather than impatience. Waiting until you can say something properly usually means never saying it at all.

Why do phrasebooks give approximate pronunciations?

Because proper phonetic notation is precise and unreadable to most people, while an approximation written in your own language is immediately usable. It is a deliberate trade of accuracy for usability, and it works well for the short phrases a traveller actually needs.

Should I learn the formal or the informal form?

Formal, wherever the language distinguishes them. Being unnecessarily formal reads as polite; being unintentionally familiar with a stranger, an official or an older person reads as rude. Several major languages make this distinction and English speakers routinely walk straight past it.

Does this work offline?

Once the page has loaded, yes — the phrases and their audio are held locally, which is precisely when you need them. Assuming a working connection abroad is how people end up with a phrasebook they cannot open at the moment it would help.

Is this a substitute for a translation app?

No, and the two solve different problems. An app handles arbitrary sentences and needs a connection and your full attention; a phrasebook covers the predictable moments quickly and works when the phone does not. Carrying both is the sensible arrangement.

What if I am misunderstood?

Slow down and simplify rather than repeating louder, which is the universal instinct and never helps. Pointing, writing a number down, and showing the phrase on screen all work, and most people will meet you halfway once they can see what you are trying to do.

🔒 This tool runs entirely in your browser. Nothing you enter is uploaded, logged, or stored.